Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
