if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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