How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize