We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
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