Betty ford says i'm here all night
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
