absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize