My friends, they love my intelligence
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Just high enough for therapy.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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