I wish I could punch you in the face.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
don't judge my taste in strippers
Randomize
