My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
how drunk are you?
Several
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
