K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
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I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
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Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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