discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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