She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
