I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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