Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
only you would photoshop your dick
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
