Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.