AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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