People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
