): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it