quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
then he tried to convert me to islam
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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