Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
