An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize