Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
