id be glad to
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I intend to get homeless drunk
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
