No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
