those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
