Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize