So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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