Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
