i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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