the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
