i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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