Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Damn victory sex feels great
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
