I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I just found puke in my bra..
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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