Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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