I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
So many bounce houses so little time
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Also, beer. Big fan.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Randomize
