what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
This is my gift to your gina
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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