Where is the hickey?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
