Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
