so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize