You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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