did you get engaged???
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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