Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
