Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
