I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
