You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
