When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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