Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
