The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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