I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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