margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
