The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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