11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
what day is it and did you see me today?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
