I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
